‘Without accepting the fact that everything changes, we cannot find perfect composure. But unfortunately, although it is true, it is difficult for us to accept it. Because we cannot accept the truth of transience, we suffer.’ ~Shunryu Suzuki
I wrote on Monday that I was redefining a “makeover” for myself, redefining the way I look at change in general, and I said that I could not be “more” than I already am.
Does that mean that I can’t change?
Of course not. It’s human nature to want to improve on ourselves and our lot. The point of that post was more that I was reevaluating the way in which I approach change. Some changes are good, but they have to come from a different place than my previous impulses for change have come from.
Instead of forcing myself or shaming myself or guilting myself into change, I have to find the changes that feel natural, that feel organic and go with those.
Leo Babuta of Zen Habits recently listed six elements of change. The one that resonated most with me was No. 3, finding the joy:
Here is the key to it all. Forget the rest of these steps if you need to, but never forget this one. Doing something you hate is possible, for a little while, but you’ll never sustain it. If you hate running, you’ll never keep up the habit for long. You need to find the joy in doing the activity, and when you do, you’re golden. So either choose an activity that you love, or find something to love in the activity, and grab on to that.
I had a moment of realization about this over the weekend when I was cleaning the house. A lot of times, I put off my chores because I think they’re going to be just that: a chore. But as I swept and dusted and organized on Sunday, I realized that I was—if not exactly enjoying myself—at least enjoying the results of my efforts. The clean floors and dust-free surfaces and clutter-free shelves made me feel wonderful, good about myself, and extremely pleased. There was joy in that chore, and I realized that if I didn’t always approach it with such disdain, such automatic dislike, these sorts of things might be much easier to do.
